In Denver, we find ourselves in a unique position as Colorado codified reproductive care into state law this year. Despite the safety Colorado offers, you may be asking yourself, “what can I do?” or “how do I stop these feelings of powerlessness?” While what happened with the Supreme Court and the decision on Roe v. Wade is scary and confusing, you don’t have to be consumed with powerlessness and hopelessness.
External locus of control
When it feels like life is happening to you, you might be experiencing an external locus of control. External locus of control refers to the idea that sometimes people think about life events, circumstances, feelings, and thoughts as being out of their control and happening to them. This could sound like, “I have no power. I have no choice about what is happening in my life or with my body.”
Internal locus of control
Internal locus of control is when we feel like our actions directly relate to the outcomes we experience. This could sound like, “I work hard, I vote, I protest, and I donate. I did everything right and the world still feels hopeless.”
What are some strategies to change this perspective?
If you relate to an external or internal locus of control, that’s okay. These perspectives can be changed. Life can feel less powerless. You can feel more in control in life. Both of these ideas are extremes; either you have no control and feel powerless, or you have so much control you feel overwhelmed. Neither has to be true.
Zoom out, take a wide view and see where you do have control in your life.
You may not be able to change the nation or change the opinions of those around you, but maybe you can offer support to those who are struggling. You can validate the feelings of others who are experiencing the fallout of the news. You can engage in activism. Your emotional response to this news is a strength. It is resilience.
Notice when thoughts are unhelpful
You can logically understand a perspective yet have thoughts that are unhelpful or keep you stuck in negative thought patterns. When you begin noticing these thoughts popping up, you can intervene. Feelings and thoughts are connected. If you notice feelings of powerlessness, hopelessness, fear, guilt or anxiety, ask yourself what you were just thinking about as those feelings cropped up. More often than not, you’ll find that the thoughts were unhelpful. Maybe you were signing up to volunteer and began feeling defeated. If you look at the thoughts you were having, did they sound like “What’s the point anyway? Nothing will change. I’m too insignificant to help,”?
Begin changing your thoughts
Instead of saying the defeating thoughts to yourself, replace them with empowering or optimistic thoughts. “The world has felt doomed for years now, and I still continue to push forward, even when it feels impossible. I can do hard things. My values are important enough to push forward.”
Help is available If you are struggling with feelings of powerlessness, or you are overwhelmed by current events, it could be time to reach out for help. A therapist can help you fine-tune the skills needed to manage difficult feelings. Colorado CBT has therapists waiting to help. Colorado CBT offers same week availability, in-person or telehealth services, and many providers are in-network with major insurance providers. Reach out today to begin your healing journey.